Tuesday, 19 May 2015

Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love for Kids and Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers about Work Images

Free Funny Sayings Biography

Source:- Google.com.pk

You don’t notice the air, until someone spoils it.

Don’t drink while driving – you will spill the beer.

If you love a woman, you shouldn’t be ashamed to show her to your wife.

Life didn’t work out, but everything else is not that bad.

I feel like Tampax – at a good place, but wrong time…

If someone notices you with an open zipper, answer proudly: professional habit.

If you’re not supposed to eat at night, why is there a light bulb in the refrigerator?

FRIDAY is my second favorite F word.

There is a new trend in our office; everyone is putting names on their food. I saw it today, 

while I was eating a sandwich named Kevin.

The speed of light is when you take out a bottle of beer out of the fridge before the light comes on.

To weigh 50 kilos and say that you’re fat, that is so female…

I have been to many places but my goal is to go everywhere

If Mayans could predict the future, why didn’t they predict their extinction?

Did you know that your body is made 70% of water? And now I’m thirsty.

What is 90-60-90? Driving past the cops in the city.

There are two types of pedestrians: quick and dead.

From the driving course material: The side mirror of a car is needed for the transfer of the rear – view to the drivers’ eye.

A car is not a luxury. A luxury is what makes the car going.

Driver, be careful of the places where children appear from!

Don’t trust the traffic light; believe in the car heading towards you.

A sticker on the bumper: Drive on the footpath – there are too many idiots on the road.

Pedestrian is always right. While he’s alive.

There is all the information you need in the road map, just not how to fold it back again.

If a pensioner is showing a turn, it means he forgot to turn it off.

Sex is like motorsports, it’s important not to spare money for good and qualitative rubber.

Hundred is not speeding, a pole is not an obstacle.

‘A pedigree bulldog missing. Founders – rest in peace.’

Careful! Angry dog in the backyard! Please do not crush him.

If you take a homeless dog and feed him, he won’t bite you. It’s a basic principle between a dog and a human. Mark Twain.

Nowadays, most of the children dream about an IPhone, when I was a child – I wanted a dog.

How would you call a person sleeping with an animal? Childhood.

Don’t feed the animals at the zoo! You should better feed the security guard!

‘Do you know if pigs have periods?’ ‘Are you kidding me? What idiot would keep a pig until she’s 14?’

A cat is a furry entertaining object with character.

Scientists proved that cows don’t give us meat and milk. We just take it from them!

There are no limits to my perfection – a monkey was thinking while looking at a human.

A rhino has bad eyesight, but with his weight it’s not a problem.

I’m just like Garfield – no food, no happiness.

Garfield: love me, feed me, and never leave me.

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat.

If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.

Women and cats will do as they want, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

Why are the camera lens circular and the photos rectangular?

UNIX – you can keep to yourself, DOS – you can share with your friend, Windows – you can give to your enemy.

Hiroshima 45 Chernobyl 86 Windows 8

Computer does what you command him to do but not what you want from him.

Daddy, daddy! What does ‘Format C: complete’ means?

Do you know how the computer won against Kasparov? Very easy – he made a check and froze.

Windows 8 install program: computer not detected.

Do you know that every time you push a key on your computer, you kill more than a thousand microbes?

People can be divided into two categories: the first category doesn’t know who Bill Gates is; the second one doesn’t love him.

The more I get to know people, the more I start loving computers.

Do you want to change your life completely? Don’t pay for the Internet.

Programmers dream – Active XXX.

Not everything is Windows that hangs…

To be wrong is human, to blame your computer – is even more human.

Be careful with your keyboard. It’s the organ of communication with the outside world.

Soon, Windows pack will contain a tube of Colgate toothpaste.

Spelling mistakes are never visible before you push ‘send’.

When creating a system which even a stupid person can use. Only he will use it.

At first it was a bit, later a byte and only then it became a word.

We will create the artificial intelligence, naturally when the real one will appear.

It’s interesting how much half-liter is a megabit.

Who the hell is ‘General Failure’ and why is he reading my hard drive?

They’re giving 8 bits for one byte!

Facebook is a social networking, not a diary

When arresting the rapist at the crime scene, the crime weapon was not found.

‘I’ve saved a girl from a rapist yesterday.’ ‘How?’ ‘I’ve persuaded her.’

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be paraphrased and used against you in a court of law.

An exactly thrown cigarette butt can be the cause of a fire!

Darling, don’t go walking around so late, you’ll get raped and won’t even notice!

The best alibi is being the victim.

I don’t drink, don’t smoke, and don’t hang out with guys. I go to bed at 10 p.m. and wake up at 6 a.m. But everything will change when I get out of prison.


Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 
Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images
 Free Funny Sayings Funny Sayings Tumblr About Love For Kids And Pictures About Friends About Life And Quotes Wallpapers About Work Images 

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